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2nd Cup for 6/18/18 – “ARE YOU LONESOME TONIGHT” For The GENTLY USED

Posted by on June 18, 2018

It had been a relaxing summer break, but the choir was ready for our annual “Let’s Make Music Together” catered taco feed and karaoke night.  These events were always a hoot, because they signaled the beginning of the church’s Fall work toward the holiday seasons of year’s-end and the following Spring.



Everybody was excited to come back together, for we were a large choir and derived real blessing from singing together.  We usually brought new people with us, for that evening let anyone looking on see that we weren’t stiff and solemn.  A few would sing the same things over and over.  Most did not.

I always worked up a love song.  One year was “Love Me Tender”.  Another was “Unchained Melody”.  Then I surprised one member by singing, “Only You” to her on her birthday.  Our quartet met and began singing at that church, so we usually wound up doing a recurrent request:  “Elvira”.

One year I’d been trying to locate a track for the Bee Gees’ “Words”.  No joy.  So, I thought, “Okay, self.  You found those lyrics to an Elvis love song, and you’ve never done anything funny, so—

Here, then, is . . .



(You know the tune . . .)


Are you lonesome tonight? Does your tummy feel tight?

Did you remember your Maalox and Tums?

Do your memories stray to that bright, sunny day—

When you still had your teeth and your gums?


Is your hairline receding, are your eyes growing dim?

Hysterectomy for her, and a prostate job for him.

Does your back give you pain?

Can your knees predict rain?

Tell me, dear, are you lonesome tonight?


—{ * }—


“Is your blood pressure up?  Can you pee in this cup?

Are you eating your low-fat cuisine?”

All that oat bran and fruit, and Metamucil to boot

Keeps you just like a well-oiled machine.


If it’s football or baseball, he sure knows the score

He knows right where it’s at—but forgets what it’s for

So your gall bladder’s gone, and his gout lingers on—

So tell me, dear, are you lonely tonight?


—{ * }—


When you’re hungry, he’s not; when you’re cold, then he’s hot—

So you start that old thermostat war.

When you turn out the light he goes left, you go right.

Then you join in a great symphonic snore.


He was once so romantic, and really no slouch,

So how’d he wind up such a cranky old grouch?

So, don’t take any bets, this is as good as it gets!

Tell me, dear, are you lonesome tonight?

( Unknown )


If we can’t have fun in this life, there’s something definitely haywire with it.

Glad you enjoyed it.

© D. Dean Boone, June 2018

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