Monthly Archives: April 2016
TEST ENCOURAGEMENT
If this had been an actual encouragement, I’d have written far more. You’re welcome.
APPLAUD THE OTHER GUY
Jim Stovall wrote it: “You need to be aware of what others are doing, applaud their efforts, acknowledge their successes, and encourage them in their pursuits. When we help one another, everybody wins.” This caught my spirit’s shirttail because I’ve wondered for years at the dearth of such open, honest appreciation for what you yourself … Continue reading
QTMs for 4/25/16: WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO ‘REALLY’ TICK GOD OFF?
Tell Him he doesn’t know what He’s talking about. Seriously. That’ll do it. Make fun of His created order, of His rules for living, and of how He organized His Universe in general and our world in particular. Look God right in the eye and tell Him He’s an idiot. Better yet, lay this one on ‘im: … Continue reading
ATTACKS ON TAXING TACKS
This is supposedly a real letter submitted to the IRS in the midst of 1995‘s weird and bizarre denial of dependents, exemptions and credits. The letter speaks for itself. Dear Sirs: I am responding to your letter denying the deduction for two of the three dependents I claimed on my 1994 Federal Tax return. Thank you. … Continue reading
QTMs for 4/12/16: SONGS IN THE NIGHT
It could’ve been me. It could have been my wife, worn down in every way by the constant drain of caring for a disabled husband dying a slow, inexorable death, responding to a writer-friend’s post, saying, “He’s dead.” It could be her, now dealing with the ebb and flow of feelings she’s unsure whether she ought to … Continue reading
Presenting The New & Improved SARCASTIC SIRI!
Yes, folks, here at last is the perfect gift you’ve awaited for decades! Okay, maybe years. Anyway, at long last, meet SARCASTIC SIRI! “Siri? Wha—“ (Bored, put-upon tone) What now? “–t’s the–huh? Anyway, what’s the best way to the post office from here?” (4-second delay) Seriously? As many times as you’ve been there, … Continue reading
QTMs for 4/7/16: “YOU FIRST.”
“Me first what? Kinda early for games, but I’m in. Let’s see. . . I get to choose breakfast First dibs on the bathroom You’re holding the door for me. Oh, no, wait! I get to choose the first table game we play tomorrow night. Am I right or what? Um. . . a little … Continue reading
FROM WHENCE COMES SMURL?
“What’d you just call me?” I–I’ve no idea what you’re talking about. “It sure sounded like you just called me a—a—hurl? Churl? What’d you say?” O – oh. You must have overheard me say smurl as I was jotting notes to myself. I couldn’t imagine how you might’ve associated yourself with the term. You can’t … Continue reading
CORPORATE STRUCTURE: THE WAY IT REALLY WORKS
Let’s coffee. You understand there’s a difference between the way you’d like for things to work and the way it’s actually done. Position. Perks. Bonuses. Bigger offices with more glass. Climbing. Accomplishing work the next three positions and next 5 higher pay grades don’t know how to do. You know. Just your average humble spandex-and-caped … Continue reading