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Posted by on January 28, 2014

So here are the top ten reasons why a dog makes a better date this Valentine’s Day:

Coffee - heart cup for two

  1. Dogs don’t talk. I could elaborate, but I think we can all agree this is a good thing.
  2. If you’re worried your dog will trash your lovely home ten seconds after you set foot outside the door, you can just put him in a crate.  The police frown on this when done with dates.
  3. Dog slobber is cute.  Date slobber is very uncute.  EVer.
  4. You don’t have to share your dessert with a dog (and probably shouldn’t). This is great because dessert is the best part about Valentine’s Day and all that sweet stuff conveniently makes dogs barfing sick.  So you get your tempting torte all to yourself.  Brilliant!
  5. For the not-so-romantic folks out there, a dog won’t look hopefully, then desperately, and finally disdainfully into your eyes when the evening doesn’t end in a helicopter ride to Paris and a romantic marriage proposal. Won’t happen.  Prolonged eye contact totally freaks dogs out.  Don’t go try it.  Just take my word for it.
  6. When a dog follows you around it’s cute.  Am I right or am I right? Pretty much nothing is better than being adored by a dog.  If a date follows you around. . . well, we call that little phenomenon stalking.  The police aren’t real fond of that one, either.
  7. Dogs don’t care if you are “presentable” or not. You don’t have to buy expensive shoes or anything else to hang out with your dog. You don’t even have to shower; dogs are, after all, nasal creatures.  They like different and—mmm, exotic aromas.  Just head out on a couple of hikes, toss a ball around, dole out a healthy belly rub and you’re golden! No makeup, no ironing, no showering or shaving required.  Dog happy, you happy.   Amen.
  8. You will never have to dream up a way to gently/firmly/sneakily “get rid” of a dog.  Who gets rid of a dog?  Dogs are fun, and funny, and goofy, and handily clean food right off the kitchen floor for you when you drop it.  Dates seem to think that kind of thing is below them.  Lame. Really.
  9. Pup snuggles are the best. Okay, snuggles from a human can be pretty good, too, but when Fido nuzzles into the nape of your neck, snarfles and huffs a grumbly sigh, you’ll stay in that exact same position for three days so you don’t disrupt the little mutt’s comfort.
  10. Did I mention dogs don’t talk?  Just sayin’.

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