What a fantastic morning! This is today! Yeah! THIS one!
“This where I throw the pillow at you? Seriously, dude. Shut to the UP, will ya? We’re not all ‘morning people’ . . .”
Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. And you’re making me laugh, the way you scrinched up your nose and spoke like a harelip when you said—yeah, see? You’re doing it again. Hey, I got it. Let’s say it together like that. Wrinkle up your nose like you just smelled some used fish and say this through your nose with me:
Sounds goofy, kind of, doesn’t it? Even you are smiling, grump.
If you can.
“Dear friend, guard Clear Thinking and Common Sense with your life, don’t for a minute lose sight of them. They’ll keep your soul alive and well, they’ll keep you fit and attractive. You’ll travel safely, you’ll neither tire nor trip. You’ll take afternoon naps without a worry, you’ll enjoy a good night’s sleep. No need to panic over alarms or surprises, or predictions that doomsday’s just around the corner, because God will be right there with you; he’ll keep you safe and sound.” (Proverbs 3:21-26)
“Okay, wait. Clear thinking and common sense?”
Mm-hmm. Sound judgment and discernment. Good planning and insight. Those.
“They all the same?”
Yep. I just wrote you the same phrases from three different translations.
“So, you have me curious enough to stay up for a little while. Gimme some of that joe. What got your engines revved this morning? It’s like somebody forgot to unplug your charger cord and you’re at 117 % which we all know is impossible.”
I know, right? Let me give you a strong suggestion, since you know I don’t give advice.
When you ask God for direction and clarity, you might want to have your safely belt buckled and your seat in the upright position.
All right, stop. Stop reading ahead. Go back and reread that suggestion. I’ll wait . . .
“What . . .?”
You’re sitting there staring at the wall with your coffee cup halfway to your mouth.
“Well, it’s your fault. Jerk. You’re the one who woke me up just to think.”
Is it working?
Psst. Reader. He asks, ‘Is it working?’ Ever known anybody like him?
“Hee-YAH-uh, it’s working. Are you kidding me? Clear thinking and common sense? And us staring primary elections leading up to a hee-yoodge mid-term House and Senate election? The country itself at stake? Lemme think: ‘clear thinking and common sense’. Hmm. That automatically disqualifies about 90% of everyone running for office …. and, hey–our primary voting is tomorrow!”
Uh, where are you going?
“I’m gonna run down to our polling place and see if they’re open for advance voting!”
I see. Well, you have nowhere in your jammies to keep your ID and car keys until you get there.
“Aw, MAN . . .!”
Yes. In case you’re curious, he did in fact stub his toe on the chair on his way past.
© D. Dean Boone, August 2014